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The Listening Gate

I knew that I wanted to become a coach before I discovered Human Design, but as I’ve learned more about my BodyGraph, I can’t help but see the inextricable links between my coaching mission and style and my design. Through my exploration of some of these gates, others can get a sense of how I see myself and how these energies might present themselves as I coach.

I’m not a certified Human Design reader and I’ve never had a professional reading done - I’ve only explored on my own and started putting some of the pieces together and intuitively applying them through self-reflection.

My greatest offering as a coach I see in Gate 13, “The Gate of the Listener,” in Ra’s traditional Human Design, “the openness of the Self in interaction” that will “attract others who will come and share their experiences.” He also calls it “the gate of the Hearer of Secrets,” and an important aspect of this gate is openness and interaction leading to collaboration. This gate is tied closely to my Gate 7 and my ability to lead others toward empowerment.

Woman sitting cross-legged on floor holding an open book
Me through my son's perspective

People who hold this gate are natural listeners. I can’t help but notice that in everyday life, I’m a magnet for people who have a story to tell. I’m amazed at the personal details others share with me even when we’ve never met before - my dental hygienist, my car salesman, for example. I think this happens because of my openness - not openness with life details, per se, but my warm and open personality that draws people in and makes them feel safe to talk about what’s on their minds. This can be overwhelming at times, but it really reinforces my belief that everyone needs someone to talk to, and sometimes we don’t have a person to fill that role naturally in our lives - or even if we do, having an unbiased ear through a therapist or coach is important.

I have had to learn to listen to myself first, which has opened me up to be able to be present and listen deeply to clients without judgment while holding self-compassion and inner power. I first had to create this container for myself, to hear my own voice, and tap into my ability to forgive myself and others before taking steps to be able to hold this space for others effectively and authentically.

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